The To-Doer: the person who does all the things. That’s me. And maybe it’s you, too. Now, I am writing this from a farmer’s wife point of view, but I know there are plenty of women out there who find themselves being the To-Doers because their spouses work long hours, or work away from home for periods of time. Or maybe they just simply ARE the To-Doers. I am actually a little bit of both situations.
Thankfully I was raised in a home where we were taught to be independent and were never excused from chores or projects. My sister and I spent our summers crossing off items on to-do lists our parents gave us. And the rest of the year found us equally as many chores. We were given the tools we needed, and had a deadline we were expected to meet. That may sound harsh, but do you think two teenagers would ever get the job done if they WEREN’T given a deadline? We painted outdoor furniture and porch rails, mowed grass, cleaned horse stalls and sheds, and collected firewood and stacked it on the porch. I was also raised in a home where my parents did everything themselves. And so we helped our parents with every major home project: building a barn, adding an addition to our house, fixing the chimney, and the list goes on. There was one project that I can’t quite remember what it actually was, but it involved those huge wooden wire spools, and I remember thinking (or maybe I said it out loud)– I bet NO one else my age had to spend their weekends doing this.
I’ve watched my dad be a jack of all trades, and somehow master it all, and I’ve watched my mom run the house, get things done when my dad worked long hours, and do things most people would never attempt on their own. Between the two of them I think it’s no surprise that I’ve taken on the position of T0-Doer. It’s probably what has helped me adjust to farm-wife life.
Which brings me back to the term itself: To-Doer. It turns out that doer is actually a word, defined as, “a person who actively does things instead of just thinking or talking about them.” I never really gave this much thought until the other day, when during a conversation about giving husbands to-do lists, I said out loud, “Oh, I am the To-Doer.” I thought it was pretty clever on my part.
That’s not to say that my farmer doesn’t do things around the house. Because he does. But if there’s something that needs done, I just do it. Sometimes when people are surprised about something I did, my response is, Well, who else is going to do it?
So here’s to us ladies, the To-Doers who…
Have went to mow the yard, realized there was no gas, and ran to town to fill up the gas cans…
Have searched the tool benches for wire cutters, extra wire, needle-nose pliers, and mended a fence….
Have searched through all of the drill bit cases and tried 7,298 bits before finding the one you needed….
Have spent a half hour backing the trailer into the barn just right, between the skid steer on one side and the grain wagon on the right…
Have looked around to see if any neighbors are watching your attempt at the task at hand, and then afterwards thought to yourself…Who Cares!…
Here’s to us To-Doers who feed animals, clean barns, use power tools, lift heavy sh*t (probably more than we should), and aren’t afraid to get dirty. We. Rock.
Here’s to us To-Doers who may not look graceful, or may not do things the textbook way, but get the job done.
Here’s to us To-Doers who have spent more time figuring out how to do something than the time it actually took to get it done. If To-Doers are anything, they’re determined.
What would you add to this list?
Just remember, you never know what you are capable of until you try.